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Hooker Fatigue
Nero the Pict Travelling to the Far East: Thailand, Cambodia, Vietnam and Laos
© 2018 James LaFond
SEP/9/18
I bought a roundtrip plane ticket, $1,100 to Bangkok from San Francisco.
I sat next to a Canadian couple on a honey moon who were pretty weirded out by me. It was twelve hours, a long flight. I was excited. It was crazy getting off at the airport because I was wearing clothes suitable for an east coast winter—this was January. I was wearing jeans and a denim shirt over a t-shirt and I walk off through the terminal and blam—90 degrees and humid as fuck, people screaming at you in English. I had an address where I could go stay and I told a dude and he drove me there. Bangkok is like Blade Runner, like LA meets the Third World, sprawl and poured concrete buildings, dirt roads, super wealthy people next to dirt poor, very ancient stuff next to more modern stuff than you see in the states, a complete head fuck.
I had to wait for visas to get into Cambodia and Thailand. Bangkok was the cheapest place to get all that paper work. I met a Swedish electrician who owned a bar and had a Thai wife and got in a motorcycle accident and when he woke up everything was gone, the bar, the kids, she took everything and he was headed back to Sweden.
There was a couple dumb bitches—nothing worth mentioning.
I visited a museum of forensics and police science in the basement of this hospital and while I was there they brought in this guy that had just died in a car accident and I actually got to see what happens and the ritualistic way they treat the body.
Did a lot of walking round and saw some kickboxing that was amazing. There was a ton of European girls that they tended to run frumpy. The Thai chicks were generally too skinny.
I never fucked with any Asian chicks when I was there. I had the opportunity, but it seemed messed up, frankly. As far as looks I would rate them from ugliest to best looking:
-Cambodian
-Lao
-Thai
-Vietnamese, they were best looking by far, holy shit, so much better looking than the rest. I think it was the admixture of European genetics that got in there, so some of them had curves.
When you are over there you get hooker fatigue. You get up and want coffee and breakfast.
If you rolled up in Vietnam a dude would roll up on a motorcycle and he’s going to be starting off real innocent, “You want tour?”
…and you keep walking and he’ll roll up and say, “You wanna smokey.”
If you say no, He’ll say, “Oh, you wan’t Yabba [Thai trucker speed] or heroin”
… and if you say no he says, “Oh, you wan’ lady, ah very nice, very good pussy, tight.”
… If yo say no then he’s like, “Oh, I know what you wan’ you wan’ man!”
…And if you say no, then he’ll say, ‘Ah you wan’ girl, you wan’ really nice virgin,”
…And then if you say no he’s like, “Ah, you wan boy, very nice seven-eight year boy,”
…and you are like get the fuck away from me you sick fuck. And at the same time as some fucker is ruining your appetite trying to sell you a child the sun is beating down on you like Satan.
-That’s hooker fatigue. That same interaction can happen to you over and over again. That is where living in Baltimore helps you out in the Third World. You just get sick of it.
I was in Southeast Asia for about a year.
I spent a month in Cambodia, a month in Laos, two months in Thailand and about eight months in Vietnam—all told about a year.
I crossed from eastern Thailand in a small chain of islands on the Cambodian border that were still pretty isolated. I stayed in a hut on the side of a cliff for a buck twenty-five and, and became friends with the dude that ran the place, a Thai military guy involved in a Thai biker gang who took me and this Dutch dude out on this boat one day to some of the remote islands. He pulls out this .45 1911 and says, “Show me how they shoot gun in America,” and we were shooting coconuts.
He shot good, spoke great English. The Dutch dude couldn’t shoot. The water was completely blue and clear.
It was also a smuggling area. One day I was there when some European dude I didn’t know said to a guy, “I want you to get me some weed.”
Funny, 7-11 in Thailand is really popular, really popular and the guy comes with a 7-11 grocery bag full of weed and I don’t think this guy spent more than 4 or 5 bucks.
There were these British people that were there, two girls and a guy. I was trying to bang one of these girls but that never happened. But there was this chick Heidi, who was dating the dude and he was a coke head and they had this big blowout on the island. They were going to go to Camboidia, but you can’t go there as a single woman. They have a really nasty blowout and he flips out. He leaves her in a heap and flies back to England and leaves her.
You might hate somebody but you don’t leave a woman in a Third World country by themselves. The sketchiest part was getting over the border so the other girl had other plans and I offered to go along with her and we went into Cambodia together. I made sure she got to where she needed to be and left her with some people who could help her out. I was glad I did it because the border scene in Cambodia, negotiating with the cab drivers and dealing with the border guard checkpoints, was ridiculous.
You go from Thailand, which is kind of like America in terms of having roads, to this unbelievable shithole with cratered roads, and an ocean ferry which is flat-bottomed. Our first night there in this town was like [the horror movie] Children of the Corn, nothing but little kids in school uniforms riding bicycles and laughing at night and there is not an adult to be seen. The door was supposedly locked but that door kept on opening and an adult male Khmer head would peek in, so I can imagine what would have happened if I was not there.
When the sun is coming up and I’m finally dozing, I hear this scratching on the ceramic tiles and there is this roach crawling along the floor as big as a small lobster. I took a lighter and her hairspray and lit that fucker on fire. She was able to glom onto his other troupe of tourist types. The crimes against white people over there are mostly crimes of opportunity.
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Sam J.     Sep 15, 2018

"...I never fucked with any Asian chicks when I was there..."

I've never been to Asia but if I did I would fuck myself into a catatonic state. I don't have serious yellow fever but those girls are small, petite and look good. As for American Women yes some of them are some of the best looking girls on the planet but their attitudes...tie that in with the fact that the girls I could get, within reason, I don't want and ones I want I can't get.
James     Sep 14, 2018

Sam, I loved this comment.

the headlong admission at the top is beautiful.

For the record, Nero is also a better man than me to.
Nero The Pict     Sep 17, 2018

Gentlemen,

I am certainly not a better man: Boils down to three factors.

1. I didn't want AIDS. The rates of various STDs in these places is mile high. Granted I sowed my wild oats in Baltimore which has its own strain of syphilis...I wasn't trying to mess with fate. SE Asian societies are very traditional to this day. Any woman that I got with would've been a bar girl or hooker. If I had hooked up with one of the locals I would have likely ruined her reputation. I certainly wasn't sticking around. Reputation counts for a good deal in those places...

2. The rates of outright sex slavery and other fucked up BS are high as hell. No way I'd have that on my conscience.

3. The last thing I needed were extraneous bitches. I was traveling and didn't want to get tied down. Could have stayed in Baltimore for that...Certainly would've been cheaper.
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