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Getting Stoned in the Hood
An Introduction to Pelting Your Fellow Primates
© 2015 James LaFond
OCT/9/15
Check your bong at the primate exhibit, fellow, and enjoy the festivities…
“I rolled on my side and pushed with my feet and shoulders [He had been tied-up before being stoned.] trying to use my feet, and my shoulder like a hand, to pull away, trying to get under the bushes for protection. I didn’t get in them, but got close enough to get some protection from the canopy. The rocks fell very close to my head.”
-George, a stoning victim
Stoners exhibit much of the same detached behavior as shooters. The target has usually been thoroughly dehumanized. This is about as basic as it gets.
I, Am, A, Black, Belt!
#22-01: night, seconds, eye-witness
Steve and Bob were minding their own business in the pool room of a South Baltimore bar. As they made to leave a drunken patron approached and challenged Bob to a fight. Bob, who built a reputation as a young man for winning fights, but now avoided violence, declined and turned to leave. The drunk followed and warned Bob that he was a black belt in judo. Bob snatched the cue ball off the table as the drunken judoka advanced, palmed it, and executed a palm strike, hitting the drunk between the eyes with an audible crack. The man was knocked out cold.
Donald
#47-01: day, seconds, first-person defender
“This was uptown, over toward the Westside, back when I had the jewelry business. I’m riding the mo-ped through this black area when these six homeboys attack from all sides—like I’m a fuckin’ extra slated for death in a Tarzan movie! I got smacked with a bottle, but it was the brick that really jarred me. Thank God I was wearing a helmet. They even threw one of those metal trash bins at me. I almost wrecked, but managed to keep going even though I was injured—and the whole time there’s a fucking cop sitting behind me in his cruiser doing nothing!
I’m injured and this slacker won’t even file a report. I took it all the way to the mayor’s office—you know, the genius that wanted to legalize crack and heroin—and all they did was harass me. Well it turns out I stepped on toes all the way up, because violent crime—especially interracial stuff—is not supposed to get on the books when you’re trying to attract tourists to this beautiful city of ours.”
In the two incidents above we have virtually all of the uses of hard chunks of the environment used as weapons. Hitting with a brick, stone, or stone-like object such as a bottle, rather than throwing it, was surprisingly common, and came to about half of all scenarios. However, uses of such things as thrown are 9-to-1 over handheld, because when people throw stuff they tend to do it in a group.
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Bernie Hackett     Oct 9, 2015

JL:

This BCP Sgt. I knew who worked in the Wild Western told me about this dude they were arresting. He went into a pose and said "I have a black belt!" One of the po-leece replied "I have a black jack!" Thunk! Problem solved.

Favorite cop story.
James     Oct 11, 2015

I know a few older tough guys who took blackjack beatings from cops. What a nasty weapon.
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