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Why Men Drink
The Khan Blesses a Lone Slavegirl's Single Question with a Triumvirate of Wisdom
© 2017 James LaFond
JUL/29/17
A verbatim dialogue from Wednesday, July 26, 2017
The adorable one looked up to her master, peeking through the crease in the pillow as she chirped, "Baby, why have you been drinking more lately? When you get too drunk, you fall fast asleep and I can't wake you up."
Thus Spake the Khan...
...as he reached for a beer:
Keeping in mind that the slave girl already answered her own question.
I drink for all three of the positive benefits of alcohol use, keeping in mind that there are numerous bad reasons to drink. Also, these uses are only to the good, as The Stagerite would say, if the imbiber is not an angry drunk, but a nice drunk, which I am.
Men drink for three reasons:
Firstly, a man drinks to socialize with other men and loosen the tongue for conversation, just enough to encourage dialogue, but not enough to blur it.
Secondly, a man drinks as a way to relax after a stressful day of oppressing the deserving masses, maintaining the disinheritance of the meek and pillaging the ruinous remnants of degenerate civilization.
Thirdly, my soft dear, a man drinks—
SO!
I!
DON'T!
CHOKE!!
A!
BITCH!!!
Get me another beer, girl.
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