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Vetting Juan Stabone
An Experiment in Self-Publishing: 9/20/2022
© 2022 James LaFond
Thus novel was written as requested by a reader who has worked his entire life in law enforcement. The plot was his idea and the first three chapters really occurred in his career. The execution is all mine, set in Baltimore as he requested. Juan said that my character TO Yao, based on the Nigerian cab driver Boomy, from my 2015 Harm City journal War Drums, stole the show. He also said that I got right to the edge of suspension of disbelief, that any crazier would have ruined the story.
Juan Stabone
Tao of the Last Good Cop
2020, 10,759 words, need a photo of a late 1970s BPD cruiser
Reading done by Juan Stabone
Editor: James
Publisher: Lynn
Juan Stabone is set in the actual Baltimore of 2020. The bad guys depicted herein, still have a stash house where they imprison Russian sex slaves, in a neighborhood I still frequent when back in Baltimore, with the operation overseen by an active duty BPD officer.
Page 1: insert comma into dust cover
Page 10: replace and for a sentence break,
Page 12: slack jawed to slack-jawed
Page 13-14: I to in, removed the from between cramped and hand, the engraving tool being an oyster shucker used on the Hood canal was taken from my 2019 winter oyster grilling invite on the Hood Canal, which I attended with the Colonel, the man used for patterned characters in Shayne Rasmussen in The Filthy Few and Major Wolf in Uprising,
Page 16: leant to lent,
Page 18: space task force,
Page 19: remove half quote mark
Page 21: replace and with sentence break
Page 22: can to then
Page 28: remove a from before an at page bottom
Juan told me the Atomic Samoan story twice. I think I invented the yak hair smoking jacket, but am not sure. This event actually happened in Seattle or Tacoma. Juan never actually served in Portland, which was a fiction we adopted to save his identity. Since Juan has since moved from the Seattle Area, I feel safe in disclosing this bit of biography.
Page 35: capitalized The Chief, removed a from before Jason, has to huh, italicize what the hell,
Page 36: tie to time, italicize Oh shit, this is it, the end, everything goes in the shitter right now…
Page 37: italicize is that Samoan snot on my boots or is it Oceanic American ball juice?
Page 38: capitalize Virus and Academy and Liaison Officer, tighten up text and reduce empty page
Page 140: I inserted myself as the only real news reporter in Baltimore, and the fact that Juan and I actually met in Portland in 2019: ‘...a complete fucking asshole! To make things worse, Juan would not even be able to set the record straight with this naddering nabob of negativity, because the schlep had gotten too old to hang with the Baltimore criminal class any more—and he was three years younger than Juan—and was, at this very moment shacked up with an out-of-work stripper in some truck driver’s garage back in Portland—aggghhhh!!!”
When Juan came into that truck driver’s house to meet us, he admitted to being a cop, something my host had “smelled” and offered for me to pat him down for a wire in the kitchen!
Page 42: fells to feels,
Page 44: Boomy, who Yao is based on, did not drink. I made Yao a drunk as a result of a brain injury, and his trying to self medicate against Corona Virus with rum, which is what I was doing when I was writing this… Thus Yao was a composite of Boomy and myself, as Juan’s tour guide of Baltimore.
Page 48: the antique BPD crusiser described here has been parked in the Box Hill area of Abingdon, MD, for the past five years.
Page 51: italicized thank God there is no traffic
Page 53-54: capitalize Virus twice
Page 55: waivered to wavered
Page 56: removed quotation mark,
Page 65: capitalized Virus
Page 67: I am inconsistent with the spelling of sjambok, which works, as the characters are inconstant with pronouncing the African cattle whip, mid to mind,
Page 70: insert who between priests and held, limp to limb,
Page 71: add commanded
Page 72: tighten up double space, removed and for a sentence break,
Page 74: second paragraph, the into they, ae into are
Page 80: redact ‘in white’ redundant
Page 81: close up space, change howeve to howeva in dialect,
Page 82: italicized There you go, instant community outreach.
Page 83: capitalized Hell
Page 85: changed Phentenyl to fentanyl, replace and with sentence break,
Page 87: break up rowhome into row home, tighten up a double space, a corrected to I in: “Yes, Terence. I am a real cop and I give a shit,” he said to the man who was still counting bags of dope.
Page 88: the back story of Yao is given as a bad outcome of the actual heroics of Boomy, who saved “the blond woman of the yuppies,” from a Negro gang rape, at the same date and location as Boomy’s rescue of the woman,
Page 89: u to up
Page 90: sentence break before ‘so’ in Terrence’s monologue, is to his on last line
Page 93: sentence break before but at top of page, this section introduces Kenny as a character, a security guard I worked with who was once rescued by his “hoodlum” sons from two shoplifters who were whooping his ass. See When You’re Food and The Logic of Steel for these true stories, is to his at page bottom
Page 98: tabluex corrected to tableaux, the added prefacing it
Page 102: no to now in last sentence of first paragraph, this was a real quote from a BPD officer who rescued Mister Kenny and permitted Kenny to punish the attacker
Page 110: Irene was one of Kenny’s coworkers, a Nation of Islam babe, and Mister Mohamed is a real Baltimore hero who beat a Mexican to death defending a stripper’s honor, and has escorted my girlfriend’s daughter to the parking garage, holding off gangs of muggers, he also caught the bus for me on a rainy night once for a $1 fee
Page 114: arrested to arrest
Page 124: end to and
page 125: rowhome to row home, this scene is based on Mister Mohamed’s actual heroics on Baltimore Street when eh defeated three fat heads in combat. I transferred this scene to Federal Hill.
Page 132: corrected spelling of Mohamed
Page 133; that construction site has since become the Under Armour Corporate head quarters gentrification zone, I to in, a common typo of mine,
Page 138: spazzing to spasming, what the hell?
Page 139: th to the,
Page 143: levelling to leveling, shoot to shot,
I am pleased that Juan Stabone is a good, entertaining pulp adventure, that is more realistic than any police drama script ever aired on American TV.
The Curtain Undrawn
The Path Untaken
the gods of boxing
when you're food
let the world fend for itself
america the brutal
broken dance
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