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Out of the Ark
The Slugger and Something in Common? by J.T.C.
© 2013 James LaFond
NOV/5/13
Last night I received two more J.T.C. comics courtesy of the anonymous person attempting to save the sorry souls of us humble grocery clerks. And you thought God did not care.
The Slugger is about a baseball player who hits a home run to win the seventh game of the World Series and gets a 150 million dollar contract. The next day he brags to his gardener who tells him he does not have a thing, because he is going to die and go to hell. The Slugger gets angry and tells the gardener to get back to work. Later that night he hears the little man praying for him and scolds him for it. The next day he is diagnosed with a fast acting cancer and becomes a whining wimp begging for a ticket to heaven, which the gardener provides. I wanted this obnoxious jock to get molested by J.T. C.’s version of the devil and instead he reposes happily ever after. What a disappointment.
Something in Common? is a riot, showing J.T.C. at his best. The cover has an emaciated panhandler being shooed away by a bulbous rich lady with a poodle up the sleeve of her fur coat. The book then goes on to make a most clear and concise case for creationism over Darwinism, the doctrine of original sin and the crucifixion and ascension. The crucifixion scene is muscular and less dark than usual, but still potent.
In his common work this is where J.T.C. loses steam as the sinner is irrevocably sucked into hell or blissfully accepts salvation. The author returns to the theme of universal commonalities of the everyday variety. Then he begins crafting the final approach with, ‘Oops, here’s something we don’t have in common anymore. Some people are going to heaven…MANY are going to hell!’
I love this guy!
We are then treated to an angel’s eye view of the crowded road to hell teaming with Muslims, Buddhists, bikers, babies, old ladies, Jews, Catholics, Orthodox Christians, adulterers, liars, people who have shacked up together and even one cretin who says as he approaches damnation, ‘I LOVE being nasty…’
I’m going to have to reread my King James Bible to find that nasty reference.
But God gives us many chances to choose the only narrow path to salvation from amongst the many routes to damnation. In fact the author leaves the reader with a multiple choice [dual, as there are only two choices concerning your everlasting—and possibly ever-roasting—soul]. And you, the semi-literate sinner, may choose a second time in case you did not get it right on the first go.
‘A Temporary Place’
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