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Eleven Crazy Bitches to Avoid
An Online Dating Service Has Selected The Right Women for the Taboo Harem!
© 2016 James LaFond
Seriously, six years ago, when I moved in here, I thought I would try dating online. Before I was done filling out my profile I was so disgusted with the process that I quit. Indeed, since I do not exist financially I could not even communicate with these babes if I wished. However, the freak show of sluts is quite entertaining. Finally, this week the bizzaro bitches went over the top. Basically, the pretty white girls are hookers, the black girls take pictures of their asses and the lonely white girls take pictures of their breasts for profiles.
24F • Washington, DC
1 photo
[Breast picture-nice d-cup on small waist. Definitely a hooker.]
26F • Upper Marlboro, MD
1 photo
Looking for occasional and clean fun. I am spoiled very ...
[This is the heaviest boned human I have seen outside of the Metrex World’s Strongest Man Contest.]
28F • Baltimore, MD
1 photo
Ask me
[Not only is this average looking home girl content to be one of 555 identically daft bitches, she has taken her picture in the woman’s room, striking a sexy pose in some public shitter.]
30F • Pasadena, MD
1 photo
Raised in Louisiana and recently moved to a new state. I like going ...
[This thin, redheaded, white girl looks like a stone-cold killer. I find her pretty—in a lethal kink way. I should be sterilized for even looking at this vampire bitch twice.]
54F • Havre de Grace, MD
1 photo
Single black ladies looking fro Mr. Right are you out ...
[To big black mammas who are entirely dressed in tasteful dresses and photographed in a plush residence and cannot spell—Oliver, if you would do the honors, I’m pretty certain they’d let us build a gym in the basement. It will get us closer to Philly and Jersey for your fights…]
30F • Lancaster, PA
1 photo
I'm here...about all I can say! I'm busy, don't freak out if I can't ...
[A life support system for a set of triple-Gs with a sense of humor. If I was still young I’d have Oliver fit me with a tracking beacon and repel into this bad idea from a Huey…with an oxygen tank!]
110F • Washington, NC
1 photo
I'm Robyn looking for fun with another one or two or whatever hit me ...
[The clueless bitch that is content with being the 337th sista to have had her avian-inspired name misspelled by her ho mother wants to blow you, whoever, and how many of you, there happens to be. How utterly unappealing.]
54F • district hgts, MD
1 photo
Looking for a man/woman who not only says and knows he/she can eat ...
[This beast had the good taste not to post a pic at least.]
46F • Owings Mills, MD
[Another endlessly imaginative sister. Who lets these people name children?]
18F • Clinton, MD
1 photo
[This pretty little incubator would like you to upload a pre-neglected knockout game player so she can get a government apartment and get tattooed up—Oh, and she seems to have lost her candy stick. ]
37F • Owings Mills, MD
1 photo
Attractive BBW Interested in meeting someone for a little fun. A ...
[More prodigious, disembodied Caucasian breasts seeking companionship.]
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Shep     Jun 19, 2016

Photo of Cay_Cay? Strictly for training purposes, of course. So that we'll know what to steer clear of. Yeah, that's it...
James     Jun 20, 2016

I can't post photos. Charles claims that this ability would herald the End Times.

She is thin, with a round face and pointed chin, straight light red hair, and would be pretty if not for those scintillant grey eyes that rip through you like a cat prowling by day.
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