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Mike Dawson & Dave Stewart
Welcome to The Man Cave
© 2014 James LaFond
My barbaric New Year’s resolution is to scan the news for manly men not afraid to put their ass on the line despite the manginatis zombie epidemic sweeping the nation.
I am nominating Mike Dawson and Dave Stewart for Man Cave Man of The Year based on events in the town of Titusville Florida. Mike is a Walmart manager who caught a mated pair of thieves loading 12 cases of Bud Light [which they should be executed for promoting through this theft] into the bed of their pickup. Although I hate Walmart and the Busch Dynasty, a warrior is still on the side of right as long as he puts his ass on the line in service to those he serves, however unsavory.
The Bud Light addicts fled in their man-crutch mobile. Trying not to get run over Mike jumped in the back and was taken on a 15-mile odyssey by the pickup driving thieves. Since my hereditary enemies drive pickup trucks, Mike really gets some Man Cave props there. He once fought off the couple from the bed of the truck when they tried to attack him at a stop. They then took him to a wooded location and tried to eject him again. He resorted to using cans of Bud light as missiles—I love this guy!
He varied this strategy by employing the cans of noxious rice-added brew as signal flares. Finally, veteran Dave Stewart came to his rescue. For the full story try the link below. It’s my half-assed link, not Charles’, so I guess you will have to type it in.
Here is to a crusade against pickup truck thieves and manginaitis zombies in general.
In December I will release the list of Man Cave nominees for Man of The Year. If you want Dave or Mike to head the list let me know.
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