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Dinner With Ajay
The Bitch Factor in Tribalism
© 2014 James LaFond
JUN/13/14
I met Ajay at a library in 1998 and she has been a proof reader for me ever since. Since about 2003 we have had dinner together about once a week. Since Ajay doesn’t care for the company of black people, who she considers to be generally loud, rude, and disrespectful, we tend to dine at eating establishments that are predominantly patronized by whites, usually by a 3 to 1 margin.
Ajay, a black, republican, NASCAR fan with a thing for heavy metal guitarists, is a good deal younger than I am. You see, in the library setting, published authors are rock stars. Last night we got together at a diner so that she could slap me with the online typo list, which included me consistently misspelling 'petal' as 'pedal' in Forty Hands of Night.
When we were being seated I noticed this middle-aged woman with her U.S. Marine Corp attired husband. He was chowing down and she was glaring at Ajay. So, being a jerk, I put my hand on Ajay while she took her seat. This prompted yet another review of the hundreds of dining out experiences we have shared, in which we tried, but failed, to recall a visit that did not prompt at least one noticeable and flagrant glare of disapproval from a female.
Below are our fascinating findings from years of dining out as mixed-race couples, sometimes her with another white guy, and sometimes me with another black girl, but usually together. I find the result of this unscientific decade-long study to make for fascinating thought food, and will resist my temptation to draw conclusions.
1. Our area features many mixed-race couples consisting of a black man and a white woman, which outnumber white man/black women mixed-race couples 10-to-1.
2. We have never noted any of the black man/white woman couples getting dirty looks, ever!
3. The most disapproving people, by a wide margin, are white women, often violently staring and glaring at Ajay, on occasion even as they smile and make eyes at me.
4. Black women disapprove at about a 50% rate to white women, but with a tendency to more violently stare.
5. The older white women are the more likely they are to disapprove of an older white man with a younger black woman.
6. The closer to 30 black woman are the more likely they are to disapprove of an older white man with a younger black woman.
7. White men rarely seem to disapprove of an older white man with a younger black woman, and when they do, shake their head rather than stare violently or gossip about us.
8. The older white men are the more likely they are to disapprove, with no young white men disapproving.
9. Black men are just as unlikely to disapprove as white men with the same age variation.
10. Black men who do openly disapprove have only done so when Ajay was out with less masculine types of white men, who do not meet the conservative black masculinity standard, a more physical standard than among whites.
11. When I have gone out with flamboyantly dressed or scantily clad black women with a slutty aura the only demographic that shows any level of disapproval is white women my age and older.
Surely, after this more than a decade-long shared observation study I don’t think we can solely attribute prejudiced behavior and tribal notions of racial separatism to men alone.
What do you think?
Do you have any similar experiences to add to this?
I will be doing a separate article titled And Your Mongrel Children Too about a crazy old white woman that we ran into at a fast food joint in Virginia. Until then, please, give a race-traitor a break!
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